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Beard Mustache
Beard Mustache

Eight Signs That She Is Trying To Change You

Over the years, you have developed into who you are.  You have certain habits, likes and dislikes.  Your personality has formed to make the unique you.  You think you are okay or maybe you think you are great.  So, why does she want to change you or tweak something about you?

There will be some compromise when she comes into your life, however, don't compromise what is important to you, what you have become.  She says she loves you, so why does she want to change you?  Why can't she accept you the way you are?

If you think that you are making drastic adjustments, then you may need to get out of that relationship.

  1. What is wrong with what I'm wearing? After all, it is your favorite team jersey.  You are a grown man; don't you know what to wear?   Evidently not.  Have you ever heard your woman say, "are you really going to wear that?"  Or, it just may be that look she gives you.  What she really may be saying or thinking is "what you wear embarrasses me."  How about that shopping trip with her when she picks out clothes for you that you may not have picked out for yourself.  You either like it or you don't.  You may try the shirt with the paisley design she loves.  If you find that you like it, then that is growth in your taste.  If you don't like it and she wants you to wear it, that is her control.
  2. What happened to my hair and face? Again, you are a grown man and you can decide when you want to get a haircut, or shave or maybe grow a beard, mustache or goatee.  Why do some woman insist on dropping the hints that you need to shave or get a haircut?  When have you ever told her that she needs to go get her hair done, or she needs to shave her legs?  You aren't going to reject her in bed if she has hairy legs, are you?  Well, that is a matter of taste, and fortunately for those that like smooth legs, she is probably going to get them slick without convincing.   Have you every grown facial hair for a woman and not for yourself?  Yes, you know that mustache looks ridiculous.
  3. You walk into your living room and you don't recognize it. Where did your leather chair go?  When did the design fairy come through and change the sofa?  When did the color palate change?  You may have not noticed, but as soon as you moved in together, she has been making the changes.  Hell, she may have even asked you your opinion, and you may have said…"oh, that is nice."  As you were watching the big game.
  4. Why is there a stuffed animal on my bed? In between the rose patterned shams (shams is a new word in your lexicon of love) sits a white puffy bear with a hat and a big bow tie.     If this happens, you have completely been overthrown.  Yes, a small, cute bear can be the end of your persona.  What happened to what you like, where is your taste in the room?  At least you have the garage as your domain.  Unless you live in an apartment... then you may not have a garage.  Instead, you get a closet to decorate.  The smallest closet, of course.
  5. Whose remote control is it tonight? Thanks for technology - DVR and TiVo.  Do I need to say more?
  6. Opera vs. Ball Game? She may suggest going to listen to Opera.  Go and try it, however, if you don't like it, stop.  If she insists on you going, tell her to go with a friend.  It is okay to do things apart.  Don't let her change you into doing something that you don't want.  The same is true about the ball game, don't force her to go.  Go with your guy friends.
  7. She Plays Door Monitor. You can't go to the game with your friends, because she may be monitoring who you can and can't see.  She may be doing this overtly or subtly.  "He was your college friend, you're not in college anymore."  How about when she says, "he is single, if you hang out with him, you'll be going out to the bars."  Again, you are a grown man, you should be able to pick your friends and what you do with them.
  8. Your job is good, but you can do so much better. She is thinking of security and wants to make sure you have a solid future to provide for her.  At least, help provide your share of the financial load.  She is laying the path for that and wants you to climb the success ladder.  What do you want?  What is your dream?  Are you letting her kill or change your dream?

Your life changes when you have someone in it.  However, be an agreeable party to that change.  Understand when you are being changed.  Is it a positive personality change or improving a bad habit that you want to change?  If you feel manipulated, then it is wrong.  The relationship will be bad.  If you stay in the relationship, you will be looking in the mirror one day and wonder, who is that man?  What did I let happen to me?

About the Author

Scott Brown

Think Divorce Before Marriage

Helping men make wise choices

www.thinkdivorceb4marriage.com

Tashtastic: Gandhi Jones won @ World Beard & Moustache Championships '07

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